What is casual about success? I think you have to care. That you should care. Otherwise, why should anyone else? What’s so bad about ‘giving a damn’ in the first place?
There have been so many opinions going around the web since Anne Hathaway’s Oscar win – everyone is coming out of the woodwork to throw their stones or wave her flag. But I was really impressed by Sasha Weiss’ smart defense of Anne Hathaway in the New Yorker. Hathaway’s been called Hollywood’s most polarizing star, and many say it’s not that they are jealous of her, it’s that they don’t trust her persona. They find her inauthentic. What I don’t understand is…
Since when did ambition, grace and optimism make women so uncomfortable? Especially women in my (allegedly post-feminist) generation?
I think it’s important to give a damn. To be amazed by the world. To love what you do and be grateful that you can find ways to do it. What is so casual about success? You work hard at something, do a good job, you’re recognized by your peers and you are stunned and honoured. If I knew there was a chance I was going to be speaking in front of billions of people, I would write 100 drafts of a speech. I would want it to be perfect. When women take their jobs seriously, we want our hard work to appear effortless, unaffected. Why is that, you think?
Do women have to act like men (or tomboys) to get respect from fellow women?
Enter Jennifer Lawrence. The girl everyone wishes they were – deflecting negative comments with casual quips, brushing off an embarrassing moment with unshakeable humour. Her openness feels real – like someone you could be friends with. She doesn’t care what she eats, she tells it like it is – she’s “real.” She “gives a damn” but in a way that subverts the expectations of Hollywood. Her persona is herself. Probably because someone told her it’s working.
Hathaway is happy to be at the party and she doesn’t hide her excitement. I’m sure she had a conversation with her publicist about her persona (like 99% of professional public figures), and settled on polished, humble, nice (God forbid). Maybe she can be a little needy, but should we fault her for having expectations, for protecting her career, for taking herself seriously? When she “gives a damn,” it feels so unnatural to us, so annoying.
Why do you think women favor the tomboy and not the diva? Why does one woman’s well-earned success make us cry and another make us scream? The real lesson here: I think it’s important for all women to give a damn. And there should be room for several different versions of that.
For all you non-commenters, I’d really love to know where you stand. Come on – she’s the most polarizing star. I’m sure you have an opinion.
This is an interesting conversation to have! I clicked over and read the article in the New Yorker.
I’m not really sure how I feel about Anne Hathaway, but Jennifer Lawrence does nothing for me. I don’t get her. I also haven’t seen her in anything, so I only have her publicity appearances to go off of.
In her heyday, was Reese Witherspoon treated similarly to how Anne Hathaway has been? To me, Reese is the ultimate happy girl–she is so beautiful and smiley all the time. Does she get away with it because she’s Southern and blonde and played mostly in romantic comedies instead of taking on more serious roles?
I don’t have a problem with the “happy girl” – I really, really appreciate it when performers delight in what they do. I teared up during Anne’s Golden Globes acceptance speech when she genuinely thanked her fellow nominees and thanked Sally Field for inspiration – that a teenager playing a flying nun could grow up to be taken seriously. Loved that part.
What about Taylor Swift’s acceptance speeches?? yikes.
(PS I found your blog through Beth Mathews)
Jamie – thanks for stopping by! Good to bring up Reese – I might look into that some just to compare. As a performer and artist, I would be absolutely thrilled and stunned if I won a Grammy – and I don’t think I”m self-important or shallow for wanting that as a goal. It’s a milestone and to be recognized for succeeding at what you delight in – that is such a huge honour. But there seems to be this delicate line with appropriate reactions to success (and those rules don’t seem to apply as strongly to men). Man, if you seem to get it wrong for one second, the media (and the rest of the ‘normal’ world) murder you! Yikes is right.
I love them both…and really, I think a lot of their differences are due to age. I began my career at 21 and was lucky to fall into the right jobs, early on. Yes, I worked hard (and had fun), but it wasn’t until later in my career when I realized how hard I needed to hustle to make the lucky opportunities happen!
this is such a good conversation allie; i’m glad you’re jumping in. i fell hard for j-law just like many of us, but i do feel like she’s working under the assumption that stumbling into success is more appealing to people than working hard and being desperate for the success a la anne. we’re digging into well entrenched stereotypes here – that women should appear effortless in beauty, success, relationships – and i think it’s good that people aren’t buying that as genuine anymore.
but here’s the thing – anne hathaway was just as clumsy and genuine and disarming as jennifer was a few years ago – princess bride, singing at the oscars, etc – and i think she’s coming into a more “serious” stage of her career that should earn respect. i want to compare her to daniel day lewis – which may not be fair – but he most certainly gives a damn about his work and takes it seriously, approaching each role with a now famous work-ethic and commitment. maybe his persona is more graceful than anne’s, but i think they care just as much.
i want to love what i’m doing enough to be crazy fan girl for the work. i also want to appear genuine when accepting praise. i hope others chime in. where’s the line? should we even give a damn where it is?
That’s a good point – should we even care where the line is?
I think that Anne Hathaway was genuine in accepting praise, but for some reason, a lot of people perceived it as shallow and put upon. Going back to that NY article… she was happy, bubbly, optimistic, bright, awed and smiling not awed and smirking (maybe like Lawrence). I think both were grateful and deserving, it’s just so interesting whose response has gained respect and whose hasn’t.